Friday, June 27, 2008

The Grip

On my run today, I ran into a "sister."  She was wearing a Theta shirt, so I asked her if she was a theta.  She said yes, but that it was a long time ago.  I said, yeah me too.  Then we stood there.  It was awkward.  A few seconds later, I ran off.  I should have slipped her the grip!  Unfortunately, I'm not actually sure I know the grip.  

The grip is like a secret handshake, not something inappropriate or likely to amount to a battery - which is a harmful or offensive touching.  It is an intentional tort.  But you know what it is not?  A specific intent crime!  The specific intent crimes are 1st degree murder, solicitation, attempt, conspiracy, forgery, false pretenses, assault, burglary, larceny, embezzlement and robbery.  You know who I have to thank for that little bit of brilliance?  Natasha Ng and her genius idea to make slightly dirty mnemonic devices.  This one is 1st sac ffabler or "testicle story."  Seriously, I don't know where I would be without her.  

Tomorrow is the first day of the track and field trials, and hopefully tomorrow Nike, who has taken over the law school, will actually supply us with the promised donuts.  Nike is using the law school as a hang out for all the athletes prior to their events, as well as a place to showcase its products.  This would all be really cool if it wasn't for the fact that we are physically barred from actually seeing any of it.  The commons has been entirely cordoned off with paneling and curtains so that you can't even peer down from the upper floors.  I'm not really sure why Nike feels the need to subvert my ultimate goal of landing a track star, but its really not cool.  Especially if I'm not going to get any donuts.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

I am possibly bipolar and might need meds

Studying for the bar is turning me into a crazy person.  I've never been very moody, but with this studying nonsense, I am up and down all day.  I wake up and I am depressed thinking about class.  During class, my mood usually perks up, especially if I decide to get a donut (by the way, starting tomorrow Nike will be supplying us with free muffins and donuts in exchange for taking over practically our entire building for the track trials!  So pumped!).  I usually am ok through lunch, because I am eating and food makes me happy.  But then I start outlining whatever subject we were force fed during class and my mood quickly plummets.  Especially since the amount of emails I used to get and would use as excuse for multiple study breaks has significantly decreased.  After outlining, I am up again and usually feel a sense of accomplishment.  This disappears when I start failing essays and problem sets, unless I am working in the JELL office where all the inappropriateness distracts me from my dismal performances.  After studying, I go running, often with Natasha, and what with the sun and the endorphins or whatever, I am once again a happy, normal human being.  Actually, I'm usually pretty happy after running too, not because of any sort of adrenaline rush, but because the only studying I do according to my self-created schedule is done in front of the tv and involves only multiple choice sets (preferable to essays) and flash card making(always a crowd pleaser).  Right now I'm watching Sex and the City and rehydrating post-run, while making flashcards.  So I'm happy.  Until 8 am tomorrow when the cycle repeats itself.

In other news, I broke my vow in Portland on Friday night.  But this weekend was pre-excused because of my mom's 60th bday bash (if we are going to be technical, I broke it the night before the party, and actually was pretty good at the party on Saturday, but whatever).  The best part of the party was the fact that there was a dj and my new most prized possession is the 30 second video I took of my mom dancing.   She has some unique moves. 

Tomorrow I have my second softball game as an outfielder for the Forrest Paint...I'm actually not sure what the mascot is.  I guess the team is just Forrest Paint.  My friend Fender, after hearing about my amazing softball skills (Sunrise Little League Allstar 1990 and 1991), invited me to join his dad's company's team.  Or maybe he just let me join because they were short on players.  Whatever.  The point is that there is a game tomorrow which gives me something more to look forward to than mindless tv and flashcards.  I predict victory.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

My broken face

Studying for the bar can be dangerous.  And I am talking about danger beyond mental breakdowns and blindness from too much studying.  When you are studying for the bar, you are pretty stressed and you want to make sure you are fit enough to make it through two grueling days of test taking, so it is important to exercise.  A large group of males studying for the bar here have started playing basketball everyday after class.  Because Natasha and I are always pushing for equality and also like to wear short shorts with basketball shoes, we decided we should join them.  This was a horrible idea.  Here's why: they play with undergrads.  And we all know undergrads have not yet developed full control over their arms and legs.  Their motor skills are simply not where they need to be yet.  Neither are their brains, but that is another matter.  

Anyway, so last Monday we donned are bball outfits, and, looking super cute, headed to the rec center to show off our skillz.  Eventually I found myself playing in a game in which I was the only girl.  This worried me, but not as much as the fact that there was a literal giant on the other team.  This guy was dunking all over the place and was possibly equal to about three Abras size -wise.  This guy also was incredibly obnoxious (at one point, he held the ball above Natasha's head, making her jump up and down like a kangaroo until finally putting her out of her misery by dunking on her).  

Sometimes when I play basketball with guys, I don't get many passes or really get to do much on offense.  So basically I just run around and set a lot screens.  This was the situation on that fateful Monday when I ran up to the three point line and set a beautiful screen on obnoxious guy.  Unfortunately for my face, obnoxious guy (who's brother is a former Duck player) didn't exactly see me (hence why my screen was beautiful) and as he swung around, his elbow connected with my nose and mouth.

As the blood dripped from right nostril, all of the other players came to my aid.  Well not all other players.  My assailant just made a joke about how I shouldn't set screens.  Once the tears has stopped falling, I responded that maybe he shouldn't swing his elbows.  He retorted that getting hit was actually my fault and that because I was in his sphere when I set the screen, I was technically guilty of fouling him.

This incident happened over a week ago but my face still hurts.  Luckily my nose looks exactly the same (since having to get a nose job is one of my greatest fears in life, this is important) and after Marie told me to stop trying to wiggle my front teeth to test them, my mouth has started to feel better.  But I think we can all learn an important lesson from this tragic tale:  stay away from uncoordinated undergrads!  

Since the incident, I have stuck with running by the river.  However, this also dangerous because no that the weather is nice, the methies have parties with their pit bulls on the banks of the river and sometimes I see dead snakes.  But at least running won't lead to a nose job.

As usual, nothing exciting is going on today.  Actually that's not true!  It was $3.99 chicken strip basket day at DQ.  I suggest you all take advantage.

Monday, June 16, 2008

I have recovered

So I have officially recovered from last night's Sorbet Disaster.  Which is good because I had a lot of stuff to do today and thus did not need to be additionally burdened by stomach cramps.  This morning I attended class, got bored, ate lunch outside, got red, outlined torts, got bored, went to Jiffy Lube, possibly got cheated, drove over to DQ, got giant cone and felt sick and then attempted to write an MPT, but eventually decided that that simply was not my best plan.  Because it was boring.  The problem semi-involved science (well kind of.  Actually not really, but it seemed like it could), so I decided to skip the pain and go running.

My life really is not interesting.  This blog might be a bad idea.  Its going to be really sad if I have to purposefully create events like Sorbet Disaster just so I have something to write about.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Sorbet Disaster June 15, 2008

Today, I ate sorbet.  And it was a disaster.  It is not a dinner.  Don't worry, this blog will increase exponentially in amazingness as soon as I recover.